X-Men: The Last Stand

'X-Men: The Last Crap'

When it was originally announced that Bryan Singer was leaving the X-Men films to go do Superman, I was not only surprised but worried. Who could make and finish the trilogy of X-men films that I loved so much with the first two? Unlike most fans, when Brett Ratner was announced after Matthew Vaughn dropped the gig, I was actually excited. I mean, sure his resume isn't decorated with any amazing cinematic movies or high-minded tales. But I loved watching Rush Hour 1 and 2 and even Money Talks. I thought he knew how to tell a story competently and was very good at drawing out chemistry among actors to provide an entertaining event. What else would you need for a X-Men film? Well, apparently a lot more.

X-men 3 is a mixed bag as the plot is not only rushed but terribly executed. The idea of a cure being found falls under the same themes as the first two movies. The fact that the cure is offered as a possibility to those who want it and isn't being forced is also great. I love that mutants have become integrated into the politics in Washington and are now recognized as the mutant population, a voting force and that the general public are still wary and scared. Great setup. However, there are hints of some sort of underlying reason why the cure is made and why Angel is the first to be tested, which is never explained. The setup of the rise of The Phoenix is lame as is the ridiculous meeting hall. I'm sorry. But Ian McKellan knows how to give rousing speeches, I've seen him give exhilarating ones. So when his speech seems eh? at best, I can't believe that hordes of mutants would consider following him. The truth is that Ratner does his best to try and make giant demolition sequences and special effects cover up the crap that is known as the script. The use of giving everyone more screentime is a bad idea as no characters are asked to be invested in since their screentime comes and goes at will. Then there is the performances...grrr.

A lot of death in this film...a lot of it. James Marsden does his best job yet as the tortured Cyclops. Kelsey Grammar is exceptional as Beast and anyone who thought it could have been done better is a fool. Patrick Stewart does pretty good as always. Famke Jannsen is excellent as Jean Grey despite the lame backstory for her awesome powers. Now let me say this, besides these standout performances, there are several performances that slip significantly...looking at you Wolvie. Hugh Jackman seems to have lost a lot of what makes Wolverine Wolverine. He has lost the crazy tough fighter attitude and most of the film is more of a tragic romance for him than anything else. Sure there are some fight sequences like the awesome one in the woods with the guy who throws wooden stakes. But I mean off the battlefield...he seems tame. Then Ian McKellan doesn't seem as up to snuff as he always does in everything else. This might be the weakest I've ever seen him in a role. Halle Berry, well, the split screentime is a bad idea as she is painful to watch. Spike looks cool but what a lame ability and Calisto is well, ridiculous. A lot of the film feels so contrived and stupid you can't help but either clap giddily waiting for the next confrontation or be upset at the lack of good story. I'm not going to lie, the lack of Rogue fighting and of Nightcrawler even showing up is hurtful. With Xavier dead, yes he dies, but its the best scene in the movie anyway, and for Nightcrawler to have even visited or to have helped in the growing conflict against Magneto attempt to kill the humans seems ridiculous. Just as it seems stupid for Rogue to have not left the line for the cure to help save her friends. Although I did like the battle between Pyro and Iceman, there are few things to like in this film besides the CG moments like when Magneto is tossing cars aside or when Mystique loses her mutant abilities. Multiple Man is used well though and I think he's quite a good cameo. But like I said earlier, the best scene in the entire film is the scene at Jean's house when Xavier dies. It's great. I also like the grudging respect and admiration of Xavier by Magneto shown after the fact, but that's different.

Conclusion:
The script needed a butt-load of more work. The actors needed some better direction at times. The cinematography is bleh usually with a few exceptional scenes shining throughout. And the majority of the film is populated with ridiculous over-the-top sequences (I'm sorry but did he need to use a bridge? Really? And is throwing flaming cars that much more scary than throwing non-flaming cars?). If you have no real feelings toward the characters from the first two and just want to see some good old throwdowns, then you should see this film. If what I hear is correct though in that they are slowly planning a 4th x-men movie after the Magneto and Wolverine spinoff films...here's to hoping it isn't directed by Brett Ratner! Oh yea, and here's to Rush Hour 3 being great!

2.0 out of 5

Wannabe